Sunday, 5 December 2021

Starport Scum 3 - the Fatties

Hello and welcome back.

Time for more Starport Scum. Introducing the Fatties. 

The Fatties come from the urban planet of Megapolis, a massive urban world. Unemployment is high (95%) and the countless billons that live there seek out new ways to get thrills or to give their lives meaning. 

The Fatties are semi professional competitive eaters who train by eating 24-7. As time goes by and they get bigger and  bigger. They have to buy reinforced bones, upgraded stomach capacity, improved heart pumps, nano blood cleaning gadgets and more. After a while they need support wheels to hold their bulk up. 

These three Fatties have fled Megapolis after trying to organise a coup against the Magistrates who rule the world. They now lurk at space ports at the edge looking for work or a ship to steal. They haven’t had any luck getting work. Starships aren’t really built for people of this size and no captain wants all the ship’s supplies eaten in a few minutes. 

Ton Drump. 

Ton Drump was a Megapolis Eating champion and minor celebrity. Concerned that he wasn’t getting enough calories he started the “Make Megapolis Fatter” campaign to get fatter and also planned to seize power. He started hate campaigns against other groups including the Megapolis Magistrates, assisted by Hatey his fan girl. He bribed crooked politicians and Magistrates in the hope to seize power. With a horde of Fatties they tried to storm the Megapolis central blockhouse but the Magistrates were waiting and arrested most of the fatties. Ton and his crew managed to flee (Ton was leading from the back like all good generals) the mass arrests and headed to the nearest Space port. Unable to book a flight they stole a cargo ship and fled to the edge of human space. At least the Megapolis Magistrates won’t find him there, he hopes. 

Mim Tartin

Mim Tartin was a Megapolis business man who ran a fast food company aimed at the fatty community. The food was designed to be highly calorific and addictive. When his food was accused as dangerous he started eating his product live on the holovid. Mim became horribly addicted to his food and was soon a fatty. Pretty soon, along with his new Fatty friends he ate his own business into the ground. Owning huge debts he backed Ton Drump’s revolution seeing a opportunity to make some credits. Mim fled with Ton when the revolution failed. 

Hatey Kopkins 

No one knows Hatey’s real name. She got the name Hatey because she dislikes almost everyone and doesn’t mind saying it loudly. It is rumoured her real name might be Karen. Hatey is a loyal fan of Drump. She adores him nearly as much as food. To try to get the Fatty community onside for the planned revolution she spread lies about any group that wasn’t the Fatties. When the revolution failed she followed the second love of her life to frontier worlds where she continues her diatribe of hate at anyone who doesn’t toady to Drump.

The Megapolis Magistrate’s have put hefty bounties on the three fatties heads. They shouldn’t listen to Ton’s deranged delusional ramblings and keep a eye open for bounty hunters. 

The figures are from the 2000AD Judge Dredd line by Warlord Games. I am thinking of using the Fatties as part of a rival crew in my (planned) 5 Parsecs games.

Thanks for looking. 

Take Care Out There.


  1. Haha, the minis are great, but the stories behind are genius :D

  2. These figures are great and you’ve really put life into them with the painting. Cracking work as always.